Woke Up

So, I *********** twice.  It happens.  The thing is I go -to do it- and like I don't want to literally be the 1 to do it like I did when I was 7.  Then, I do it.  Then, if I'm not tired - if I am, I roll over, look up into the ceiling and don't see it, roll over and don't know what happens then, really..  Then, if I'm kinda awake by then.. I just kinda, you know, never feel any 1 intense moment - and then I wake up and rat about it like it's *** in the building and maybe I'm just a porn bunny.

So, I had a bad dream.  Last night I remember Ellen DeGeneres like maybe she had touched me and was wrestling with me I think with my arms wrestling hers.  So, I remember I was on 1 side of a bed in the living room with my mom and like my brother online sending a cutesy evil message.  Ginny was on the other side, a bit taller, maybe from bad frozen pizza.. and some things happened, like I rolled over onto the floor it seems and stuff like that and she was like ratting on about the summer and me missing her, not realizing how fast 3 month go by.  So, she hugged me and I didn't feel anything and was thinking about the rest of this month.  :|

Dream

I met like 4 girls who looked the same, some taller enough, sleek, thick, reddish blonde haire, bangs, freckles, English, with an accent like me that lumps to American speakers.  We were in a big camp class.  They were nice to me.  I told them about Ginny.  I think we were in a big auditorium with her, and she was sitting in it.  She got up and told us about the assignment, but there was only a slice of me there, I really couldn't soak anything in.  Then, I got out and spoke with some people, I think a mellow, cute boy who helped.  I was reveling the whole time in the average hight being 5'2", wanting to connect that..  So, anyway, then, for some reason, I thought about Ellen DeGeneres, and I was feeling bad, like a bird or baby pony, I found when I woke up like because I was simply being attacked, and so, like I was posting what if I was a kid, so I imagined like I was a kid and she picked me up, though it didn't feel too real, just made me feel like recognized, and I said, "mom!" and barely recognize how that happened nor any feeling with it, you know, and I guess I imagined person said for whatever reason, "Okay," and like you do to a kid I learned from observing my environment.. she put my head down and then I thought ha what if my back was being rubbed because I was nervous I guess and that lasted a bit and then she quickly went around to the room of the meeting and since we knew Ginny must be there + my parents we went back out and I had to change and come back in and for some reason she just showed up and left after a bit.  Well, she was there when I cursed about the medicine and stuff repeatedly.  My high school principal, who retired, was there.  Funny.  I remember saying, "Shit."  I might post more about it, later.

Dream

I remember being in Renée Fleming's class and Ginny's at nights.  Her was around 11 AM.  I had been to a class and she gave me a lock and I locked myself in a desk and she had a huge wrench to get it out.  I remember going to the cafe and there was like maybe 3 or 4 different lines of food.  They had like mushy beef today, so I got it, with a bunch of other stuff.  A shorter, fat lady with p**** hair told me to get more in another plate, like beans and rice and macaroni and cheese which seemed mostly mushy with stuff infiltrated in.  Renée Fleming told me to ... wait I was eating all this candy, like a few candy corns for awhile and thought I had tootsie rolls.  It turned out I had candy corns with little beads and kept eating them, that she said to eat, like because . So, then I went to the bathroom with a student who was probably bigger or supposedly older.  The bathroom was like big and complex, like such a complex thing, very dark and blueish green and shiney.  I finally locked myself in and ate the candy corns, locked myself in safely as a girl passed.  I guess I left and was in the car with my dad.  I probably almost went back to class.  I was in the car with 2 other girls like my Facebook photo kinda.  I imagined sitting in the car as I'd imagined supposedly, nostalgically looking by, with a sash tied around my waist, a big sash, like with a dress, like maybe a colored sash and a less-colored dress.  Supposedly, we were in the nation's oldest continuing city, and I said to go to the oldest (wooden) school house and then my school, of the oldest parish.  It turned out it was night, and there was a walking cat wearing dark glasses so as not to hypnotize anyone, a black and white cat in like 80s pin sorta black and maybe grey glasses sitting on its nose as it hopped up skipping many steps.  I forget now, oh yes, me not being all white it was still alive from around 1700 ready to get me in the school there.  There were other creepy things.  My dad went along like he was a flying piece of art and sang and missed certain peak notes that I would get and so did the cat.  Earlier, I remember I was on another adventure, like a water slide.  I guess I was stuck there.  I thought .. well there was this disgusting like hot dog with fuzz around it punching something in its ear that caused a hole of blood.  It kept putting the device in and out.  It was talking to Ellen DeGeneres.  Something happened to me that wasn't as bad with blood, but it bothered me.  Then I imagined she was really a spirit on my body, like she really was and she was plastic surgery-ing my face to look like those blue men.  It felt good just to talk to her.  It's like my face was too puffy from the cold.  So, I was with another girl when I was done.  I guess the most interesting part was the old cat.  You know, I posted on IMDb, "Would you want Johnny Depp to insult you just to talk to you?"  The thing is when he talks to you he can be insulting even if you are just being nice.  What else?  Also, I had some pictures of me where I looked more like I was from New Orleans, and for some reason I looked that way after talking to my grandma.  Some people go in there and are successful, but the people from there may not be very nice.  Also, my mom affected 1 of my eyes to seem more Asian but not look as European as her.  I didn't follow suit.  So, I mean, it was just a mistake.  I was recently thinking it was annoying Italian people from the South wanted to transform my dad.  I just realized how crappy that is.  I just know that Italians are treated differently and that if I were Italian I wouldn't do what they do.  Why do I feel I got a message at the end of this?  Why would you do what an Italian does?  You don't.  That's a topic.  We don't know.  Who all did that to my face?  Etc.  Renée Fleming?  I wouldn't do that.  I mean, I wasn't doing anything before.  You're really just seeing things.  We should do something like that to you.  I'm sorry if you're mad at yourself..  If you have a problem, you're not allowed to.  Leave my family alone.  You're gay.  You can't hurt them.  I'm not my family.  You can talk to me.  I don't hurt you.  I don't make fun of you.  It seems there's more to say, but I don't know what to say.  I know my head was changing from skipping school.  It was getting bigger and poofier.  Um, my face does not affect you.  I am not from Pennnsylvania.  Please, stop hurting me and misinterpreting me.  I'm not a Care Bear.